As I mentioned in my previous roundup, visiting my parents is always a bit tricky. I love going back home and seeing everyone again, but it’s also really challenging staying positive and calm.
Seeing my soul sisters again
I’m an only child, so I never knew how it felt to have a sister. I had a few really good girlfriends throughout my life, but as I moved on, I often lost touch with them.
One of the good parts of the holidays was seeing my cousins again after a year. Even though I don’t see them that much, I know that I can share all my struggles with them. We all face the same challenges when we go back home to see our parents.
Out of the whole family (and we’re a huge family), there are only a few people that are like me and that I really get along with. I’m incredibly grateful for having these two ladies in my life and catching up with them always puts things into perspective.
Don’t complain, take action!
You might have noticed that I’m often feeling frustrated and restless when I go back home. This year was no different and after two weeks of family time, I was really looking forward to going back and having my own space again. I was especially excited about moving into my new home in the New Year!
I’m an action taker. If I don’t like something, I think about ways I can change it and I start implementing these changes as soon as I can. Life isn’t about avoiding problems, but about getting used to solving problems quickly and more efficiently.
Unfortunately, my family doesn’t see it this way. They like complaining, as it gives them a reason to drink. And do you know what’s worse than complaining? Drunk people complaining! I wish I could see a solution to this challenge, but no matter what action I decide to take, it’s never the right thing to do in my parents’ eyes. So I’ve learnt that I can’t please them. I’ve learnt to try a little less and not to take it personally when everything that I do is wrong again.
After the holidays at my parents, I was feeling really conflicted. On one hand, I’d love to spend more time with them and help them, but at the same time, I know how miserable and depressed I would feel after a week. I had to remind myself the airplane oxygen mask rule – always put yours on first, then help others. The same rule goes for self-care – first, you have to help yourself and take care of your own needs. Only then you can help others.
I have a huge list of really interesting books to read where I’m constantly adding new finds. One of them is Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It by Kamal Ravikant, which I read in one go over the past weekend.
There were two really powerful quotes in Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It:
“The key, at least for me, has been to let go. Let go of the ego, let go of attachments, let go of who I think I should be, who others think I should be. And as I do that, the real me emerges, far far better than the Kamal I projected to the world. There is a strength in this vulnerability that cannot be described, only experienced.”
“What if you don’t believe that you love yourself? Doesn’t matter. Your role is to lay down the pathways, brick upon brick, reinforce the connections between the neurons. The mind already has a strong wiring for love. The body knows it as well. It knows that love nurtures, that love is gentle, that love is accepting. It knows that love heals.”
How about you? Have you read any interesting books over the holidays? Let me know in comments!